Thursday, January 31, 2013

Child for Sale

I wanted to write a short, but sweet post about today. Today is my gotcha day. The day that I brought joy to mom and dad's life (more joy than when my brother came).
Every year on January 31st we celebrate my Gotcha Day. I actually like my Gotcha Day more than my birthday. Except not many people remember to tell me happy gotcha day on Facebook because it doesn't list it as a birthday...Maybe I'll have to change that.

When it's your birthday you start to reflect on your life...your accomplishments, your disappointments, your wrinkles forming around your eyes.

On my gotcha day, I reflect on my life and play the nauseating game, "what if?"
What if I never was adopted and still living in Korea? Ironically enough I probably would still be at Iowa State but would talk very differently.
What if I was adopted into another family? One that was rich, or poor or didn't have to deal with an older brother?

I recently read in my baby book that my medical history on my adoption papers said, "heart murmur, slightly jaundice but still adoptable."
What if I wasn't "adoptable?" I felt like an old couch put on Craigslist!

How would my life be different if I was adopted into a different family...How would I be different? I definitely believe in nurture vs. nature. I don't think I got my extreme weirdness from my birth parents. I probably wouldn't be a St. Louis Cardinals fan, maybe a White Sox fan if I didn't have a father who brainwashed me as a child.
And I hate to admit it but everyday I find myself thinking sh*t...I'm turning into my mother. I feel bad for my future kids because I will so totally embarrass them.

And then I stop thinking about the what if's and I start thinking about how lucky I am to be where I am now. No, my life is definitely not perfect, nor is my family. But I know that I am loved very much by a lot of people (so popular) and I don't want to think about if I was adopted into a super rich family that resided in California (I'd imagine it would be nice though) because what I got .... it aint too bad.

And every year I make the same joke. To my friends and family: you are all welcome that I am in your life because without me, you'd never know laughter, joy and happiness.

Thanks for reading :)


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